I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. Psalm 27:13-14
I just wanted to give everyone an update on our situation. There hasn't been much to tell honestly until just recently. We are living our life with our kids and waiting to be able to bring our son home and complete our family. It is surreal some days. We are running from one activity to another and having fun but both Nick and I know, in the back of our minds, that we have a missing part of us out there half way around the world. In the quiet times, I find myself wondering if he is having fun. Does he know us? Are we as abstract to him as he is to us sometimes? We know him based on his medical records, some school records, a case worker's write-up, and pictures but we don't know if he is afraid of the dark, or if he likes peanut butter and jelly, or if he loves Legos. So many holes, so many things we have to wait to learn. The waiting is the hard part. I have mentioned it time and again, but waiting is really hard. I know that God is using this time to teach us patience and dependence on him but wowsa, 2 1/2 years is a long time to wait. We got new pictures of him visiting the airport in Hong Kong and he looks so big now! Again, we know on paper that he will be 8 next month but now he is actually looking like it and that's hard. Everyone thinks about adoption as somethign that happens to infants and toddlers but there is such a need for older children. Everyone deserves the love and affection that parents can give.
When I am surrounded by "What-If"s and unknowns that can cause some anxiety and worry, I need to take comfort in the concrete things that we do know. We know that we should be traveling in April. (YAY!!!) We know that we have provisional approval to bring him into the US. (Another YAY!!!) We know that he is starting to learn English. We know that our waiting will be ending soon. We know we have an amazing God who will use this entire journey for His glory! It always comes back to trusting in a mighty God who knows what He is doing and what the eventual outcome will be!
Monday, January 13, 2014
Friday, June 21, 2013
Finding joy in the little things
We are still waiting to bring home our precious son. We know that things are moving in the right direction but it's a very slow process. The kids are getting impatient and excited and are starting to truly understand that Manny will be home soon. Of course, we don't know what "soon" means. I have started gobbling up all sorts of blogs and journeys of other families as I try to prepare for what life may be like once he's home. I have been to trainings and read books on attachment and behavioral problems.I am also trying to learn at least some of his language so I can communicate with him and try to calm his fears in time.
It's a scary thing knowing that he is 7 years old and grew up in an institution since he was 1. Right now he is with a foster family and they are having problems with his behavior. Nick and I receive updates regarding his behavior and occasionally pictures. The problem with these updates is that they loose something in the translation and it is really hard to gauge whether they are something to be concerned about or just kids being kids. He likes to talk non-stop - so does my oldest. He didn't want to eat dinner one night so he hid it in his wardrobe - my 3 year-old doesn't eat dinner ever but she feeds the dog. He got in trouble at McDonald's for breaking his fries into little pieces and he cried until he made himself sick - all 3 of my kids have that flair for the dramatic. See, it's "normal" around here and his foster "Auntie" in Hong Kong wants to call a psychiatrist.
I know full well he will have trauma and behavior issues. You aren't born to drug addicted parents, abandoned in an institution with 16 boys to a 2-room house, shuffled off to a foster home 6+ years later, and then adopted into a strange family in a different country with a different language without some (maybe a lot) of trouble. I take hope in reading others stories about God's redemption of these little souls. They give me an idea of what I am in for possibly as well as how well God can use these little guys. I have found a great source of strength through http://www.nogreaterjoymom.com/ . She is an amazing mom and believer and she had a recent post about adopting and loving on these institutionally held kiddos. Through that post, I found numerous other blogs of moms and families who have been where I am now. What a comfort and a joy!
Right now, in this seemingly never-ending season of waiting, I am learning to find the joy in the little things... a hug from my youngest, a smile from my oldest, a laugh from my son, peace and quiet with my hubby once the kids are in bed, a good night's sleep (rare around here), even a great workout at the gym that helps me get through my day. All the little things that we really need to stop and say a prayer of thanks for. Some days I need to be reminded of this and other days they are much easier to see. So take time to find some joy today. Look for the little things that tell you God is in control and He has your best interests at heart!
Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days. Psalm 90:13-15
It's a scary thing knowing that he is 7 years old and grew up in an institution since he was 1. Right now he is with a foster family and they are having problems with his behavior. Nick and I receive updates regarding his behavior and occasionally pictures. The problem with these updates is that they loose something in the translation and it is really hard to gauge whether they are something to be concerned about or just kids being kids. He likes to talk non-stop - so does my oldest. He didn't want to eat dinner one night so he hid it in his wardrobe - my 3 year-old doesn't eat dinner ever but she feeds the dog. He got in trouble at McDonald's for breaking his fries into little pieces and he cried until he made himself sick - all 3 of my kids have that flair for the dramatic. See, it's "normal" around here and his foster "Auntie" in Hong Kong wants to call a psychiatrist.
I know full well he will have trauma and behavior issues. You aren't born to drug addicted parents, abandoned in an institution with 16 boys to a 2-room house, shuffled off to a foster home 6+ years later, and then adopted into a strange family in a different country with a different language without some (maybe a lot) of trouble. I take hope in reading others stories about God's redemption of these little souls. They give me an idea of what I am in for possibly as well as how well God can use these little guys. I have found a great source of strength through http://www.nogreaterjoymom.com/ . She is an amazing mom and believer and she had a recent post about adopting and loving on these institutionally held kiddos. Through that post, I found numerous other blogs of moms and families who have been where I am now. What a comfort and a joy!
Right now, in this seemingly never-ending season of waiting, I am learning to find the joy in the little things... a hug from my youngest, a smile from my oldest, a laugh from my son, peace and quiet with my hubby once the kids are in bed, a good night's sleep (rare around here), even a great workout at the gym that helps me get through my day. All the little things that we really need to stop and say a prayer of thanks for. Some days I need to be reminded of this and other days they are much easier to see. So take time to find some joy today. Look for the little things that tell you God is in control and He has your best interests at heart!
Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days. Psalm 90:13-15
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