Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Going into this process we were warned by everyone who has ever adopted before that there would be mountains of paperwork. Even our adoption counselor warned us but you never truly understand it until you have to fill it out and make copies. I truly believe it is the way the governments and the agencies involved make sure you aren't wasting their time and that you are serious about wanting to adopt.
It's a stark contrast to having a biological child. No where does someone ask you to fill out a questionnaire about your past, take a hard look at your emotional baggage (and anyone who has lived a life has baggage), and really take a look at your marriage, disciplinary style, parenting skills, etc to find out if there is anything there that would keep your from being a great parent. No one looks at your financial information, your last will and testament, or your decision about guardianship if something were to ever happen to you when you have a biological child. Frankly, maybe they should.
These questions have forced us to continue with our growing pains but to also be crystal clear about how we want our children raised, what we want our family to look like and to be, how we want our relationship to run, etc. In short, it has be an awesome wake up call for us to grow closer together and closer to Christ because we are really learning to rely on Him in all of it.
The other unintended positive (well, sort of) side effect is that we all had to have physicals and submit them to the agency. Getting on a scale for my physical was a shock. I now have the motivation I need to lose the few pounds that I need to in order to be healthy and live a long life for my children. It also unearthed some really dangerous things about Nick's health that are not necessarily something within our control. We eat pretty healthy, watch our cholesterol numbers,etc but when it's a hereditary problem, that may not be enough. In the coming months, we will be watching our diet even more closely and retest Nick's levels to see if the few changes we can make will help. More exercise, even the dreaded push-ups, should help both of us in the long run. Maybe I will learn to like it...Maybe...but I am not holding my breath.