We are still waiting to bring home our precious son. We know that things are moving in the right direction but it's a very slow process. The kids are getting impatient and excited and are starting to truly understand that Manny will be home soon. Of course, we don't know what "soon" means. I have started gobbling up all sorts of blogs and journeys of other families as I try to prepare for what life may be like once he's home. I have been to trainings and read books on attachment and behavioral problems.I am also trying to learn at least some of his language so I can communicate with him and try to calm his fears in time.
It's a scary thing knowing that he is 7 years old and grew up in an institution since he was 1. Right now he is with a foster family and they are having problems with his behavior. Nick and I receive updates regarding his behavior and occasionally pictures. The problem with these updates is that they loose something in the translation and it is really hard to gauge whether they are something to be concerned about or just kids being kids. He likes to talk non-stop - so does my oldest. He didn't want to eat dinner one night so he hid it in his wardrobe - my 3 year-old doesn't eat dinner ever but she feeds the dog. He got in trouble at McDonald's for breaking his fries into little pieces and he cried until he made himself sick - all 3 of my kids have that flair for the dramatic. See, it's "normal" around here and his foster "Auntie" in Hong Kong wants to call a psychiatrist.
I know full well he will have trauma and behavior issues. You aren't born to drug addicted parents, abandoned in an institution with 16 boys to a 2-room house, shuffled off to a foster home 6+ years later, and then adopted into a strange family in a different country with a different language without some (maybe a lot) of trouble. I take hope in reading others stories about God's redemption of these little souls. They give me an idea of what I am in for possibly as well as how well God can use these little guys. I have found a great source of strength through http://www.nogreaterjoymom.com/ . She is an amazing mom and believer and she had a recent post about adopting and loving on these institutionally held kiddos. Through that post, I found numerous other blogs of moms and families who have been where I am now. What a comfort and a joy!
Right now, in this seemingly never-ending season of waiting, I am learning to find the joy in the little things... a hug from my youngest, a smile from my oldest, a laugh from my son, peace and quiet with my hubby once the kids are in bed, a good night's sleep (rare around here), even a great workout at the gym that helps me get through my day. All the little things that we really need to stop and say a prayer of thanks for. Some days I need to be reminded of this and other days they are much easier to see. So take time to find some joy today. Look for the little things that tell you God is in control and He has your best interests at heart!
Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days. Psalm 90:13-15